By Dr. Emanuela Quagliata, psychologist at Aventino Medical Group, Rome
At Aventino Medical Group, with the support of our paediatricians, I work together with our paediatric neuro-psychomotor therapist to organise special days dedicated to parenting and to infant development in the first months of life. These meetings are designed to offer new parents a calm space for listening, observation and open discussion about the very first steps in their baby’s growth.
Every family is unique, just as every child is unique: what is helpful in one situation may not be helpful in another. These meetings are not intended to provide prescriptions or to tell parents what they ‘should’ do. Each child grows at their own pace; some develop more quickly in certain areas and more slowly in others. The experience of pregnancy and birth is lived differently by every mother and within every parental couple.
The aim of these meetings is to observe the child together, explore their signals, and reflect on the most appropriate ways of responding to them, enriching one’s understanding of the child.
At times, it can be very useful to look at difficulties from a new perspective. We may focus on the feelings of the mother and father, on the possible challenges of breastfeeding, on organising sleep routines, or on the difficulties in understanding or tolerating the baby’s crying.
In the first months of life, the infant has very limited ways of expressing what they feel and they are in a state of total dependence and helplessness in relation to the caregiver. We will reflect on the meaning of the child’s behaviours and on the parents’ doubts and concerns. Mothers and fathers can find much practical information in books but in these meetings we make space for your personal experience, understanding the meaning of your baby’s emotional states, her/his mental development, and her/his relationship with their parents and other significant caregivers.
The bond with the child begins long before birth: for a long time, mothers – as well as fathers – have imagined themselves in the role of parent. Some fears are present even before pregnancy; at times they are clear, while other times they remain more hidden. The birth of a child inevitably brings changes in the couple’s life, and the pregnancy itself heightens attention toward one’s inner world and toward the baby who is about to arrive.
When pregnancy or birth is difficult, or has involved risks for the mother or the baby, these fears may influence the formation of the first attachment bond. Sharing thoughts and concerns can help build this fundamental attachment bond more calmly, supporting the well-being of the child and the family.
Quagliata,E. ‘Neonati Visti da Vicino’, Astrolabio. ‘Closely Observed Infants’ Karnac.
Quagliata,E. ‘Cento e un Bambino’ Collana di libri per genitori.
Quagliata, E. ‘Un Bisogno Vitale: difficoltà alimentari nell’infanzia’, Astrolabio.