Identity, life transitions and reconnecting with your authentic self
By Dr. Janina Fandel, Psychologist at Aventino Medical Group, Rome.
Throughout life, we all play many different roles: student, professional, partner, parent, friend or caregiver. While these roles can provide meaning and direction, they do not fully define who we are. At different stages of life, we may find ourselves asking deeper questions about our identity and the person we are becoming.
Identity is constantly evolving
One topic that seems more present than ever in today’s society is identity. Who do I identify as? And perhaps just as importantly: who do I want to be seen as by others?
Our sense of identity is not fixed. It develops over time and is shaped by our experiences, relationships, values, and the environments we live in. While a stable sense of self can be important, becoming too strongly identified with only one aspect of life can become limiting. If our identity depends mainly on one role, achievement, or characteristic, we may eventually feel stuck or disconnected from who we are beyond that single part.
Identity across different stages of life
This is especially true during adolescence, a period in which identity formation plays a central role. But identity questions do not end there. They often reappear during major life transitions such as graduating, moving, starting a first job, entering a relationship, becoming a parent, or experiencing loss and change. At these moments, people may begin to question whether the choices they made still fit who they are becoming.
The influence of society and social media
In today’s world, the pressure to define ourselves can also come from society and social media. We may present carefully selected versions of ourselves online, which can raise questions such as: Is this really me, or just the version I want others to see?
Over time, constantly adapting ourselves to the expectations of others can create distance from our own inner experience. We may begin to feel that we are performing an identity rather than truly living it.
Exploring identity with flexibility
At the same time, identity is not something that should remain rigid. Exploring different interests, values, and ways of being can be an important part of growth. Especially in a world full of options, experimenting with identity can help us discover what truly feels authentic. Yet too many possibilities can also feel overwhelming and sometimes lead to uncertainty, self-doubt, or a weakened sense of belonging.
When psychological support may help
When these experiences become persistent, or begin to affect everyday life, speaking with a psychologist can be helpful. For example, someone may notice recurring self-doubt, emotional exhaustion from trying to meet other people’s expectations, difficulty making decisions, or a growing sense of disconnection from what feels meaningful. Others may find themselves functioning well on the outside while feeling increasingly unsettled inside.
In this sense, psychological support is not about telling someone who they are. It is about offering a reflective space to explore thoughts, emotions, patterns, and boundaries with greater clarity. It can help people reconnect with their values, preferences, and sense of self beneath the many roles they play.
A space for reflection
If these reflections resonate with you, psychological support can offer a space to explore them with greater clarity.
Dr Janina Fandel offers psychological consultations in English and German at Aventino Medical Group.
Appointments can be arranged through our reception or booked online via Doctolib.